Tuesday, November 18, 2008

YOU are the cause of this recession

now that winter draws in and people stay indoors there is less to do on the streets so i will start using my computer instead. a lot of things have changed since i last wrote my blog on a regular basis . i no longer process blood, urine and fecal matter for the health service and since i got out i have been working very long hours doing factory work and having nothing to show for it.

i do miss how easy office work was and now i am doing real work highlights just how easy an office job can be when you sit by a computer all day and pretend to work when you are in fact using internet explorer instead. maybe the reason why windows is more popular than apple in offices is becauase it can multitask between excel, msn messenger and solitare quicker than you can say 'the boss is coming'. however it is more obvious to my boss when i'm meant to be in charge of a convayer belt but reading todays paper that i am not working, and this could cause me to loose my job and yet another coleegue to loose their finger whereas its easy in offices to get away with a few extra windows on the screen. i do miss the 30+ funny emails a day though.

in a way i feel cheated that i am earning ten times less than i did at a desk but working ten times harder. plus i dont get to sit down any more, tea and wank breaks are a lot shorter and those special times that make up the fabric of the office calender are not observered either; the times when entire days are devoted to non-productive messing around in the name of good causes andd festivities (comic releaf, children in need, bring your child to work day, december). although these help cover the bottom of a bucket with 5 pence coins for ethopians they atually cost the british businesses billions in lost time for the sake of the accounts department dressing up in bondage gear for the day, i would call this industial sabatage. instead charitys should blackmail bosses into coughing up a few thousand pounds in return for NOT distracting their staff with sponsored custard pie fights and baked bean baths to raise awareness of global hunger.

these charitys might also havve a word with the BBC who seem hell bent on sabotaging their own TV schedule by replacing their un-funny serious shows with un-funny comedy versions. the only thing i found funny was an unintentional Eastenders special where the actor who plays a peodofile called Tony who seriously said the line 'i cant wait to do special things for children in need tonight'. that i think was a bad choice of charector and line given the occasion and only one step away from the bbc rolling out gary glitter on stage singing about gang bangs with etheopian babies on his knee. i am suprised that the daily mail havnt picked up on the eaasteners mistake yet but give them a few more days of no one else caring , run a horror story and then 30 thousand people who never saw it will complain to the prime minister resulting in eastenders taken off the air for 6 months and the live culling of terry wogan in public.

anyway if you are reading this in an office between the hours of 9 to 5 then i hold you personally responisble for contributing to your company and countrys demise. although people like me do not earn as much as you we work harder - a lot harder. compared to my laast office jobs and everyone i know talking about what they dont do at work i have seen this with my own eyes, today, whilst breaking my back lifting heavy boxes non stop in a florecent lit factory with horrible Eagle FM competing to the noise of heavy machinery during an 8 til late shift.

now stop reading this and get some work done

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