Monday, April 25, 2016

All Donald Trump selfies looks like he face swapped a dick pic






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Saturday, April 23, 2016

poem for a lonely saturday night

"saturday night.

once again i am impriosioned within these four walls.

other men of my age are now in winebars enjoying freedom, technobeat music, russian poppers and the touch of a ladies skin.

i remain at home watching sitcoms

browsing endless web sites looking for answers

slowly applying a soothing layer of bariatric skin cream between mothers folds 

for this will be the only lady i rub tonight

i just want to love

And to be loved

for my heart, mind, soul and genitals."








(C) Roger Smalls 2016








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Wednesday, April 20, 2016

the guardian newspaper stance on europe

i am very baffelled when i read the gaurdian website to find more information about europe. 

they try to scare me to vote to stay in europe so everyone can benefit from using businesses abroad and then they preach its bad for david cameran to use businesses like banks abroad. they are hypercrites and their readers scare me with the comments they leave.

europe



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Sunday, April 17, 2016

Armpit sniffing dating

i have had mixed results with speed dating nights but i read with enthusaism that there is a speed dating night in 2 weeks time where i get to smell womens armpits.

https://billetto.co.uk/events/120777

unfortunatly it is in london and costs too much, i would have to pay for the train ticket then pay for the entrance fee along with buying nice girls drinks. it makes me sad to know that otters are having fun while i am stuck at home. but it does make me want tofind a job more so i can enjoy nights like this.

The website has some details of the order of events in 'the cloud'....................................

Program:
  1. Arrival + cocktail of perspiration
  1. Lecture on power of the pheromone
  1. The sniffing ritual
  1. Post-ritual compliments and conversation
  1. Explore the Queen of Hungary Water cloud
We can’t promise anything, but hope that where dubious scents, biological instincts and romance collide, you might just find your match.
All sexes and sexual preferences are welcome, tickets are split 50/50. Tickets are £10 and include welcome cocktail and session in the cloud. 

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Thursday, April 14, 2016

i revieced a goverment eu leaflet today

I RECEIVED THIS pamphlet today from the government asking usnot to leave Europe. I have discussed matters with mother in depth tonight and I think we should leave euriope..
.
waste
everyone says that things from Europe will cost more if England leaves however I have researched things and found this is not the case:

current cost to buy pair of GERMAN lederhosen





from Germany (IN THE EU) on ebay: £59.99 + £7 SHIPPING to England across europe
from england (IN THE EU) on argos: £29.99 + £4.99 SHIPPING to 2.8 miles down the road.
from China (NOT IN THE EU) on ebay: £11.99 + FREE SHIPPING to England across the world

current cost to buy a nice FRENCH croissant





from England (IN THE EU) in starbucks: £1.19 FOR 1
IN America (NOT IN THE EU) in WALMART: $1.99 FOR 10!!!

as you can clearly see countrys outside of Europe like china and america are paying significantly LESS for europeon products compared to us suckers who pay MORE. we can be only better off. I think this is government scaremongering and I wish to leave Europe now so I can enjoy the freedom and prosperity of places like Bejing and Detroit.










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Wednesday, April 13, 2016

Thought for the day

has anyone else noticed that oats and head scabs look and taste the same?

oats

scabs






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Monday, April 11, 2016

the daily foot for week commencing 11th april 2016



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Thursday, April 07, 2016

i am obsessed by meat


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Wednesday, April 06, 2016

junior doctors are just greedy

i became enraged today when i saw the news that junior doctors want more money and want to work less. right now i do not have a job and would be greatful for any work that is available. i read that junior doctors make can make over £23000 a year and good ones make £700000 per year.

and they are compalining £70000 is not enough!


i have never heard of a poor doctor before, if 700000 isn't enough as a starting salary before hitting the real dough then as a normal doctor with a mercedes and a 12 bedroom house this it is pure greed. i know starting salarys for most jobs are not huge by their privileged expectations, but you have to expect very little cash when you start any job.

plus they moan about long hours. if you don't have enough money then it wont matter because you dont have any spare time to blow you wad on anything. they should just be happy, when i worked for the NHS logging stool samples i felt a sense of pride even though i was on £16,000 and suffered leaks because i felt in some small way that i was helping sick people who deficated in plastic jars.

these people digust me. be happy that you are clever and privalaged enough to be doctors and that people trust you that one day you may become a ginocologist.

model junior doctor from the good old days

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Saturday, April 02, 2016

why cant we reclassify migrants as tourists?

migrants shouldnt be a dirty word but sadly it is. but by reclassifying migrants as tourists this would be better for peoples negative attitude, it would mean greece would once again be a tourist hotspot and the daily mail would write about the great tourism happening in the uk. that is all i have to say.

tourist

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