lonely

i have been keeping myself to myself this last week, i found a nice website that has lots of free passwords for porn sites so i have been busy checking those out. a lady emailed Mr Adam Curry saying that she had a bad reaction when she heard my voice. thats not the first time a lady has had that reaction and reported me. i have disgussed these matters last night with my therapst and we both came to the conclusion that the last thing i want is to upset adams audience.i dont wnt adam to loose any audience becuase of my interactions with him, even madge is upset with me for no reason.

i know that adam understands my feelings and knows i would never do anyting to harm him. listening to him he seems so very busy these days jetsetting and whatnot, i wish i could help him in some way, even if its just to tidy up those plants by his driveway i dont mind doing it. i know i have no expertese in running a milion doller company, but i can always leave him to do that in his study area whilst i perform tasks deemed too menial for him. if its just cleaning his car, taking his dirty clothes to the laundrette or mowing the lawn; if adam does not do these then he can record more shows.

its just no good when he's not in the country, i don't know what to do with myself in the evenings. i dont know what to do with my time. i think i will draw some pictures. i should stay off my feet for a while.