Poem dedicated to Kate Upton

Cushion for the pushin'

Have you ever wished you could step back in your memories?

Ever longed to walk along a nice beech?

Have you ever wanted to eat endless cake with a lovely woman?

Or fallen deeply in forbidden love?

Ever waited out in the rain all night for her to come home?

Ever shit in a Dyson Airblade?

Looking at the stars longing for the next time you’d see her?

Some of us gratify this love and others can only dream

(c) Roger Smalls 2016

Minecraft is why the internet is slow

i have not been online for a very long time and have just managed to get the pc in the loft working again. it has taken me three weeks of arguing with virgin media just to get back into hotmail and blogger.

if technology and the internet wants to take off in this country they need to make things faster.i read once that computers double in speed every two years, i was looking forward to the utopia everything being available before i even thought i needed to download it, but surfing the web now is slower than when i left it years ago. all my bookmarks dont work, half the pictures on my blog are gone and the internet is worse.

everything now has videos on it. news websites have videos that stop me reading the news. poetry websites have videos that stop me reading poems. even youtube now has videos that stop me watching videos i wanted to watch . when i do see youtube videos they are too slow or are about something called minecraft. i remember the good old days of the internet when peoples modems would spend their time productivly downloading pornography but nowerdays they are too busy loading minecraft videos that they probably didnt ask for while they try to read poems.

minecraft

i will spend the remainder of my day endevouring to remove the layers of dust, shattered ambitions, semen and pringles from my computer keyboard in order to update this blog to transcribe and document my thoughts, dreams and observations on the world as i see it in 2016 and find chinks.

oh no Jack LaLanne is dead

I am very sad to hear that the antique bodybuilder Jack LaLanne has died today. here is my farewell poem.

Pumping iron all your life

Inventor of the power juicer

Now pumping in the clouds

Shower me with your juice

farewell jack.