Five fading fads in 2011

with all journalists compiling 'best-of' lists over the new year and not covering any actual news i have decided to make my own.I thought of loads more than five but it started looking like a serial killers hate list so i stopped, if anything happened to any of these on the list i would be prime suspect.

twitter
I cant see twitter taking off on mobile telephones as the last time i tried it i was landed with a massive phone bill,people will just stick to text messages. From what i understand facebook is worse as it not only has people posting benale trivia but games posting benale trivia too.

when twitter goes bankrumpt in 2011 for not getting round to doing a business plan it will be forced to switch off perminanlty and this will cause headline news for weeks on end. Currently when twitter goes down for 5 minutes it triggers headline news causing TV networks to rush out and interview official spokesperson stephen fry to help him express himself. but if twitter survives for another year then the 140 charectors will be shortened to 70 when its users attention spans and IQs drop even further.

even gay men have annoying birds

The tea party
although i know very little about running a country i do know that a political party run by a TV news network that claims it can solve americas problems by complaining about the opposition is bad. The phrase 'Teabagging' also conjures up rude images in my mind involving rush limbarhg, sarah palin and crouching.

the tea party

Flashmobs
I once thought i had been invited to a flashmob but it turned out it was a wrong number, i just went to the bus station and met a confused old lady. if you dont know what a flashmob is, it is where lots of random peeople suddenly turn up in a public place, do something annoying and loud and generally get in the way. the equivelant in the olden days would be a group of french exchange students suddenly blocking the esculators at the shopping center, except T-mobile wouldnt be there to film it for a commercial.

when flashmobs go bad

Emos
With rupert murdoch spending all his money on the teabaggers he;ll have to close myspace down and emos will not have anywhere else to go. As they cannot go out in direct sunlight and are always committing suicide their numbers will be extinct this time next year.

some emos

Davina maccall
The most humane thing any of us can wish for is that she;ll die quickly and peacefully.

die

twitter

i have given twitter an opportunity and opened an account a while ago but am not impressed. although it allows me to update the internet from my mobile phone i cannot easily express my thoughts within the limits of 180 charectors.

the number of celebrites using the site has increased as the race to publically get the most fans grows. twitter feels like standing in a crowd at a red carpet event whilst everyone shouts 'hey steven fry, im going to the dentist'. i am not sure steven fry cares much for this information and wish he would just get on with writing another book or being melchet. it is all very strange.

i used to respect steven fry, but now he is always in the news promoting himself on twitter i'm getting steven fry overload - he needs to stop self promoting so much or do another disappearing act in france and leave his iphones at home for a month. It is like an early adopter of the envelope promoting Avery so he can get more used knickers in the mail. the difference between soiled duds through your letterbox and twitter messages is that they aren't wafted under everyone elses noses every time one is sent.

twitter needs to address the problem of being able to search for women between a certain age, size and european nationality and filter out profiles with photos only then i can see it catching on mainstream.

i will continue to use with the site with caution but am going back to blogger and hotmail for all my communication and dating requirements.

back online again

i can finally get into my blog. they talk about britain becoming 100% connected, yet these so called experts couldnt even let me into my blog. i think it had a lot to do with forgetting my password.


because my life is so very boring right now i have had little to say and therefore twitter seems an ample recepticle for the few words i have.it is an intregeing site and it allows me to update my thoughts via the phone which is a very exciting prospect when walking home and/or using the toilet. twitter has been in the news recently as being 'the next big thing', i would loved to have seen the BBC when they announced a PR spokesman from Twitter would be coming on to explain the site, but he was limited to do it in 140 characters or less. i am not sold on twitter yet for the same reason that i shall not use facebook----- none of the people whom i communicate with in guildford use it, we are all on SMS, i dont really want to reunited with old school bullys nor torture myself with images of prettygirls that never were.

i am no nerd

i havent used my computer properly for months until i started blogging a couple of weeks ago and now i am already turning geeky. earlier today i made a mistake when putting some holes in a cubical wall and for a split second i expected an undo button to be on the drill. although i think current technology will not allow this feature i hope that black&decker will find out a way in time for next christmas.

i am worried this may get worse as i opened a twitter account last week to see what is so great about telling the world someone is taking a dump ,although i would not concider myself a true nerd yet as i cannot think of a valid excuse to use it when i'm supposed to be working. i simply want to find girls who are up for it in less than 160 charecters and somehow send free text messages to mates.

technology is mearly mans way of justifying his existance when the clock on his parents video recorder needs changing, anything more complicated is just showing off.